A lazy life is an empty life, but "early to rise" gets the job done.
Proverbs 12:27, The Message

I was talking with my wife today about a text message I received.  Without going into detail, it was an upsetting message.  What it pertained to bluntly reminded me of my current situation: unemployed.  The day was going pretty well before my phone buzzed.  I was painting our upstairs bedroom, listening to the 36 songs my band will play next weekend ... listening to them for the ump-teenth time, you'd think I'd have them memorized by now.  Anyway, like I was saying, the day was going pretty well until ...

Have you ever woken up on a Saturday with the sole purpose of doing nothing all day?  Nothing except eating what you want, watching whatever you want on t.v., and then eating some more?  I have.  Guess how far Mr. ADD got into that day ... an hour ... maybe.  Have you ever come down with the flu, or a cold, and stayed home from work all the while looking forward to doing nothing all day?  I have.  The first day is okay, simply because I spend most of it trying to sleep away how I feel.  The second day is torture.  I don't sit still well.  Have you ever planned one of those wonderful getaway weekends where the only thing you have to do is sit by the pool, drink stuff out of glasses with little umbrella's in them, and order room service?  I have ... well ... not at a resort or hotel, but at our cottage.  By the second hour of the first morning I'm looking for something to do.

There is a law in the universe, a law of physics that says this: a body in motion tends to stay in motion, while a body at rest tends to stay at rest.  For the most part, our bodies are used to being in motion.  For the most part, our society is geared around waking up in the morning, going to a job or running a business, coming home after 8-10 hours, spending time with family or engaged in a hobby, then going to bed to get rested up to do it all again the next day.  When we fall asleep at night we tend to stay asleep, resting.  When we get up and get moving, we tend to stay moving.  It's what we do.  Are we programmed for this kind of life?  I don't know ... but it's what we tend to do ... for the most part.

February 2, 2010 I left my house at 5:10 am to drive to Sparrow Hospital in Lansing, MI.  I arrived, checked in at the appropriate desk, was ushered back to a changing room where I put on a gown and red footies, crawled under a heated blanket, and waited for a surgeon to open the six inch scar in my back for the fifth time.  The Friday before that was probably the last time I was in motion, the way I'm accustomed to being in motion.  The last time I could say I was actually getting the job done.

I came home four days later.  Because this wasn't my first rodeo, my wife and I had the house ready for my arrival.  We turned our office on the first floor of our house back into a bedroom, so I could access things easily (things like the kitchen, bathroom, and the 42" Samsung), and sleep with all my 'stuff' (walker, cane, brace, ice-my-back machine, and of course, my laptop) without disturbing my wife every night.  I lived in that room for about three months. 

Mid April I received a phone call from my then employer.  The plan was for me to come back part time for a month, then resume my duties full time.  They called to tell me that there really wasn't any work for me to do, and that I might as well stay home and continue collecting disability.  Call me crazy but that sounded like planned insurance fraud to me, but what do I know?  So I did.  I went back to work on May 17.  May 19 at 11:00 am I was called into my boss' office, given a letter, sad face, and a handshake, and sent on my way.  They laid me off due to, what else, lack of work.  I believe it was for other reasons, but that's for a future blog.  I don't count May 17-19 as days where I got stuff done because I didn't.  It was true.  There really wasn't any work for me to do.

At first being laid off seemed like a blessing.  You see, an old friend had talked to me for a year about going into business with he and his dad.  It wasn't something I was going to rush in to, so I let it sit on the back burner for that year.  After I got that call in April I thought it might be worth sitting down to talk to them.  What they offered seemed legit.  What they had done over the last five years seemed impressive, and the opportunities that had for the future seemed promising.  After praying about it, and discussing it at great length with several people around me, I decided to go for it.  I could see the handwriting on the wall at work, so I felt I had nothing to lose.  By getting laid off, I could start this new business while getting unemployment insurance compensation.  God, why can't hindsight be foresight?

So I walked out of work ... smiling ... loading boxes of stuff into my car ... ready to take on this new adventure ... ready to get stuff done ... because the day after I got laid off was the day I was planning on turning in my resignation.  God saved me yet again.  You see, in Michigan, if you quit a job you don't get UIC.  Thank you God!

I stayed busy for a while doing some freelance consulting, but it didn't feel the same.  I was still gigging with my band, but I always did that before.  I know I made choices that got me where I am today ... I'm not blaming anyone for where I'm at ... but in a way I feel like my life was ripped out from under me.  In two weeks it will be a year since I've felt like me.  "A lazy life is an empty life."  I don't think I'm lazy, but I have days where I'm lazier than I want to be.  I'd rather be working, providing for my family, creating and designing and constructing things like I used to.  My intention isn't to add anything to the scripture above but I think you could turn it around and it would be just as true ... An empty life is a lazy life.  Like I said, I don't think I'm lazy, but my world seems a lot emptier than it ever has.  My life feels empty.  I don't feel like I'm contributing to the good of the world ... or my household for that matter.  String enough empty days in a row, and even the most productive, energetic, quasi-workaholic like me can feel lazy.

I don't know what tomorrow will be like.  I really don't have a clue as to where I'm headed next week, next month, or next year.  I have no idea what God has in store for this empty, angry, disappointed person I've sort of become.  Maybe a little more than sort of some days.  Here's what I do know ...

I am accepted...

• John 1:12 I am God's child.
  Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God
• John 15:15 As a disciple, I am a friend of Jesus Christ.
  I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.
• 1 Corinthians 6:17 I am united with the Lord, and I am one with Him in spirit.
  But he who unites himself with the Lord is one with him in spirit.
• 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 I have been bought with a price and I belong to God.
  Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own;you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.
• Colossians 1:13-14 I have been redeemed and forgive of all my sins.
  For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.

I am secure...

• Romans 8:28 I am assured that God works for my good in all circumstances.
  And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
• Romans 8:31-39 I am free from any condemnation brought against me and I cannot be separated from the love of God.
  What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died more than that, who was raised to life is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written:"For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughter"No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
• Philippians 1:6 I am confident that God will complete the good work He started in me.
  being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
• 1 John 5:18 I am born of God and the evil one cannot touch me.
  We know that anyone born of God does not continue to sin; the one who was born of God keeps him safe, and the evil one cannot harm him.

I am significant...

• John 15:16 I have been chosen and appointed to bear fruit.
  You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit, fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name.
• 1 Corinthians 3:16 I am God's temple.
  Don't you know that you yourselves are God's temple and that God's Spirit lives in you?
• Ephesians 2:6 I am seated with Jesus Christ in the heavenly realm.
  And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus,
• Ephesians 2:10 I am God's workmanship.
  For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
• Ephesians 3:12 I may approach God with freedom and confidence.
  In him and through faith in him we may approach God with freedom and confidence.
• Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me.
  I can do everything through him who gives me strength.